Writing task 2, lesson 7: Discussion essay
写作，第七课：讨论型作文
Here’s the question and the full essay that you saw in the lesson:
下面是你在视频里看到的问题和写作全文：
Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged.
一些人认为应给鼓励孩子有竞争意识。
Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults.
其他人认为孩子应该被教育成为全面型而不是攀比成为更有用的成年人。
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
谈论两种观点并给出你自己的观点。
People have different views about whether children should be taught to be competitive or co-operative. While a spirit of competition can sometimes be useful in life, I believe that the ability to co-operate is more important.
人们对于孩子一个该被教育成竞争性的还是综合性的持有不同的观点。
On the one hand, competition can be a great source of motivation for children. When teachers use games or prizes to introduce an element of competitiveness into lessons, it can encourage children to work harder to outdo the other pupils in the class. This kind of healthy rivalry may help to build children’s self confidence, while pushing them to work
independently and progress more quickly. When these children leave school, their confidence and determination will help them in competitive situations such as job interviews. It can therefore be argued that competition should be encouraged in order to prepare children for adult life.
一方面竞争会让孩子更有动力。当老师用游戏或者奖励将竞争元素引进课堂时，可以鼓励孩子更加努力去超越同班的其他同学。这种良性的竞争能够在促使孩子独立工作和更快发展时帮助他们建立自信。当这些学生离开学校，他们的自信和决断力在一些竞争性的场合将会很有利，例如，在他们工作面试时。因此，这可以说应该鼓励孩子的竞争性以让他们能够为成人生活做好准备。
On the other hand, it is perhaps even more important to prepare children for the many aspects of adult life that require co-operation. In the workplace, adults are expected to work in teams, follow instructions given by their superiors, or supervise and support the more junior members of staff. Team collaboration skills are much more useful than a
competitive determination to win. This is the attitude that I believe schools should foster in young people. Instead of promoting the idea that people are either winners or losers, teachers could show children that they gain more from working together.
另一方面，让孩子为成人生活各个方面所需要的全面性能力可能更为重要。在工作中，成人被更期待于团队协作，根据上级的指示而工作，或者能够领导和支持下属工作人员。团队协作技巧比竞争力更有利于成功。所以我认为，学校应该放松对年轻人的约束。与增强谁是胜利者或者失败者的概念相反，老师应该给孩子们展示一起工作的过程中所获得的。
In conclusion, I can understand why people might want to encourage competitiveness in children, but it seems to me that a co-operative attitude is much more desirable in adult life.
总之，我理解人们为什么鼓励孩子们的竞争性，但是对于我未来的生活来说持有全面型发展的态度更具有吸引力。
(270 words, band 9)
Analyse the essay by completing the following tasks:
1. Count the sentences in each paragraph. Did I use my normal approach, writing 2 sentences for the introduction, 5 sentences for each main paragraph and 1 sentence for the conclusion?
1，数一下每一段中的句子的数量。我是用我正常的方式，一句话介绍，每个主要段落中用五句话，一句话用于总结吗？
2. Highlight the linking words in each main paragraph. Which method did I use in each one: ‘firstly, secondly, finally’ or ‘idea, explain, example’?
2，注意每个主段落中的连接词。对于“第一”，“第二”，“第三”或“想法”，“解释”，“例子”，每个单词我用的哪种方式？
3. Underline the good vocabulary that I mentioned at the end of the video lesson.
3，注意我在视频课里提到的好的词汇。
Answers:
1. I did use my normal approach: 2 sentences, 5 sentences, 5 sentences, 1 sentence.
1，我用了我正常的方式：2句话，5句话，5句话，1句话。
2. Linking in paragraph 2: on the one hand, this kind of, while, these, therefore .
第二自然段的连接词：另外，那种，当··时候，那些，因此。
Both paragraphs develop one main idea: idea, explain, (example)
两段都阐释了一个主题：主题，解释，例子。
3. See the video lesson.
3，看视频教程。
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